remember when zack and cody entered a parallel universe
and london was smart
and maddie was dumb
and esteban was a woman
so basically they were their stereotypes
As your girlfriend, I will make it my duty to turn you on at the most inappropriate of times.
*sunlight hits your laptop screen*
every piece of dust in the world
1. Your skin may never be perfect, and that’s okay.
2. Life is too short not to have the underwear, the coffee, and the haircut you want.
3. Everyone (including your family, your coworkers, and your best friend) will talk about you behind your back, and you’ll talk about them too. It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other.
4. It’s okay to spend money on things that make you happy.
5. Sometimes without fault or reason, relationships deteriorate. It will happen when you’re six, it will happen when you’re sixty. That’s life.
does your brain ever just produce disturbingly violent thoughts out of nowhere
like terrible, horrible, thoughts
for no reason at all
and then you snap out of it and you’re like
i don’t want to kill my mom
what the fuck
they’re called intrusive thoughts and apparently are very common